My Bucket "Fucket" List

• I have PTSD. Fucket!
• I have Agent Orange Diabetes. Fucket!
• I have sexual dysfunction. Fucket!
• I can't feel my legs. Fucket!
• My arms are going numb too. Fucket!
• I have right ulna nerve pain. Fucket!
• I have flashbacks and nightmares. Fucket!
• I function best in complete isolation. Fucket!

Feel The Steel

I could never comprehend it
How anyone could decide to quit
It's the ultimate of depression
And the final digression

There's always been another path
To avoid this deadly wrath
Until just the other day
When I was ready to die away

I could feel the steel
In my hand so real
My finger on the trigger
To pull it with vigor

I didn't have a gun on me
Or a rope to hang from a tree
But the desire was so real
I was ready to seal the deal

How could it go this far
My thoughts were so bizarre
I slept on it over night
And avoided that deadly plight

I added up everything wrong with me
Decided that was somebody I didn't want to be
It was no longer worth being alive
With my health taking such a dive